Maybe her head was too heavy when she took this picture of herself...
I gave the girls baths tonight before tucking them into bed. While I was combing Eloise's wet hair, Evie asked me, "Are you always thinking about something?"
Have you been reading my blog? I thought, remembering this recent post. But instead I said, "What do you mean, honey?"
"Do you always think?"
"Well, I think so. Do you mean, do I always have some ideas or people or something going on in my head?"
"Yep. I do! I really do. Do you?"
"Yeah. And I don't like it."
"You don't like it? Why not?"
"Well, sometimes there's just so much stuff up there, it kind of hurts."
"Hmmm. Like, you'd kind of like your head to just be empty for a while? With no thoughts?"
"Yeah. I have too many thoughts, and my head starts to feel heavy."
"Well, Babe, when your head starts to feel too heavy, ask God to take away some of those thoughts. He will. He really will." Then I wonder, And why don't I remember my own advice about this sometimes?!?
Well, after putting it off for nearly two months, I am finally blogging about Eloise's fourth birthday party. I'm not really sure why, but I've always avoided anything too princess-y with my girls. Cinderella is one of the probably four movies the girls have ever seen (Sound of Music, Mary Poppins, and White Christmas being the others), and they love it, and I've enjoyed watching it with them. But I just haven't pushed the whole princess thing...I think it can be a bit overdone, I guess. However, this year our preschool curriculum includes lots and lots of fairy tales, so Eloise has been exposed to "The Princess and the Pea" and "Sleeping Beauty" and "The Frog Prince," as well as many others. And, apparently, she likes them, because when it came time to plan her birthday party, she announced that she wanted a princess party, with a castle cake. So, I obliged:
Goofy princesses (and a prince)
Opening princess presents
The girls had fun dressing up in their princess garb. I didn't capture them in any of the photos, but Eloise also wore her yellow, sparkly, high-heeled (for real!) Minnie Mouse shoes. I think she really enjoyed herself, which is the most important thing!
Next up: Thanksgiving! (Unless I change my mind...)
Man, I love my girls. I love to sit and watch their expressions, to see them thinking and understanding, to hear them laugh and sing. I love reading with Evie, and talking about what we've read. She rarely misses a detail, and her depth of understanding amazes me sometimes. I love talking with Eloise about life. Her four-year-old perspective of things is so honest, her compassion so genuine, and her zeal so pure. I love playing with Audrey. She pushes baby dolls in strollers, bringing them to me to hug and kiss and change their clothes. She dances dollhouse dolls through the dollhouse, turning to me from time to time to babble her explanation of what the characters of her play are saying and doing. She marches around blowing into a plastic recorder, pausing frequently to shove the slimy thing into my face for me to try. I just love them!
I was just telling my sister, Molly, how I tend to think things through a lot, without saying anything until it's all thought out. A lot of times, I don't even say anything at all. Often I realize it was a silly thought to be thinking, or I am simply satisfied with my own conclusions and don't feel like anyone else would care much anyway (not in a "poor me, nobody likes me" way, but in a "that certainly isn't earth-shattering!" way). As I've been thinking about my thinking, I've realized that I fail to blog for a lot of the same reasons! When I was trying to keep up with the 25 Giveaways of Christmas--and I did better than I had expected!--it was easy to sit down and type up a quick post because I had a question to answer: Jill Savage wanted to know something, at least hypothetically, so I told her. (And no, so far I have not won anything in the Giveaways! She still hasn't posted a winner for the grand prize, so there's still a ray of hope, but I'm not holding my breath...) But over the past couple of weeks, it has occurred to me at some point each day, I really should blog today...maybe I'll write about such-and-such... And as I think through a potential post on "such-and-such," I eventually think myself out of posting it, because, really, who cares? I don't even know if I care! (And, yes, I do realize that I have failed to blog about anything related to Eloise's November birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years...I plan to do those things once I get things figured out with my camera and computer!) However, for the sake of posting something in the year 2010, here are a few thoughts that seem to surface frequently as of late:
- It is a good and noble and right thing to do something for another out of Christian love, but when it is not truly a sacrifice--when it costs the giver nothing--is it really love? Am I really sacrificing for others, or simply giving what is convenient?
- Or, if one does make a sacrifice of comfort or resources (time, money, energy) to do something for another, but proceeds to complain about the inconvenience of the act, whether aloud or to himself, can God be completely glorified? Am I at all turning the spotlight toward myself, that I might receive recognition or pity? Do I realize how wretched I look in the light designed to shine on my holy God?
- Speaking of resources, am I ever mindful of the immense blessings that surround me, or do I always wish for more? Do I consider the wealth of resources my own, using them to make myself "happy," and giving God the leftovers? Or do I remember that everything I have is really His, and make every effort to put the time, money, and energy He has given to me into things that show His love and further His kingdom?
I guess if I made any New Years resolutions this year, they would probably have to do with these (and other) thoughts I've been contemplating...I truly hope 2010 is a God-Glorifying year of Great Gratitude and Giving!